More on the Real Me

Having started to think about all the different versions of “me“, I tried to think about how to work out whether there was a real me somewhere buried in among them all. If there is, how do I find him?

I tried to think about where I felt most relaxed, thinking that might be a clue as to which me is most real, and was rather surprised to conclude that I’m actually pretty relaxed when I’m at work. So is the “me at work” I mentioned before closest to the real me?  Maybe. 

All I’m doing now is trying to allow myself to simply be a bit more relaxed wherever I am, to encourage the real me out to the surface. I think he’s buried. That might mean that bits of me that some people haven’t seen much might start to come out in unexpected places, but that’s surely a good thing. Unless it’s a bad thing.

Introducing the “Real Me”

“Who Am I?” is a question that troubles my tiny mind from time to time. I was recently trying to explain what I mean to a friend, telling him that there seem to be several versions of “me” depending on what I’m thinking about. There’s the me I’d like to be; the me I think I might be; the me others perceive; the me I’d like others to percieve; the me I think others might actaully perceive… and so on.

Context makes a big difference, too: there’s me at home, me at work, me at church, me in court, me online, me when I’m on my own - all quite different people in some respects. I’m sure there must be many other ‘me’s that don’t come to mind right now.

The question, then, that I find myself pondering is this: where, in all this, is the “Real Me”? Is there such a thing? Are they all the Real Me? I’ve mentioned elsewhere that I often feel I don’t ‘fit in’. Is that because I’m being the wrong me? Or because I’ve lost track of who I really am - if I ever knew.

I do recall this subject coming up around the dinner table with friends once, and I thought it was interesting that Rachael seemed not to have any of these questions. Rachael is Rachael and remains so regardless of context. At the time we concluded that this might be a male/female difference, but I’ve since spoken to a couple of people who would disagree. Yes, some girls have thoughts like these, too.

The friend I was corresponding with recently came out with this:

It seems that at some time the brain (human) suddenly expanded and the two lobes had problems connecting all the different functions. One seems to act like a telescope whilst the other is a microscope. Great from a species point of view, (especially a tribal one), where the different views can give us finally a good answer, however, for some poor individuals the effect is confusion and a destabalising inability to focus.

Hence who am I and to whom?

The internal communication can sometimes be like a aural conversation… some people hear voices….

[Some people] soak up info excellently and don’t suffer the destabalising influence of the two halves trying to make a decision with a multiplicity of views.

I think you have a fiesta in your head as to conversations but just enjoy the party spirit, whilst I (at times) slump in the corner and try to focus on one poor guest instead of enjoying the general atmosphere.

(Edited slightly to remove personal stuff)

I like that. There’s a party in my head and everyone’s invited!

The Dawkins Delusion

I’ve finally got hold of a copy of Alister McGrath’s The Dawkins Delusion. (Thanks, Andy, for the loan.)

Although I said months ago that I wasn’t sure about reading it, nothing else obvious has come my way in repsonse to The God Delusion, so I’m very glad to have something else to prompt my thoughts. I’ve not opened it yet, but once I get going I’ll try to make a point of letting coming here to make a note of what I think.

Mad, Bad, or God? Or something else?

Was Jesus Mad, Bad, or God?

Why do I ask?

Well, there’s a common attempt to explain the fact that Jesus must be God because the only alternatives - that he was mad, deluding himself, or bad, deluding others, don’t quite fit with what we know of him. I think the idea originally comes from CS Lewis. As I’ve heard it explained, “don’t try to tell me that Jesus was ‘just a good man’. He hasn’t left that option open to us.”

But surely there is another option. How do we know that Jesus has not simply been misrepresented? Misquoted? Had words put in his mouth (and actions to his hands) by later commentators?

In other words, to what extent can we trust scripture to be a true and full record of what Jesus said and did?

Laughing IS praying

Came across an interesting thought here whilst aimlessly browsing today.

It works for me. Even if it is a bit twee in parts.

Site Stats

My goodness, look what happens if you don’t post for a few days…

Words from a “Former Christian”

Been poking around on the old interweb thingy for (more!) stuff to read and came across a very well-written and challenging blog called “Unreasonable Faith“, written by a guy who once believed and now doesn’t. What I’ve read so far sure is interesting stuff.

Blogger.com vs WordPress.com

It’s been a few weeks now since I transferred this blog here to WordPress.com from its former home of Blogger.com. So what’s the difference?

Well, overall,  I’m preferring it here at WordPress.  The interface is somehow neater, and I like the very much greater control over the comments system. And the built-in stats are very useful. I was impressed by the way WordPress managed to import all my posts and comments from Blogger when I made the switch, too. I’ve a feeling that wouldn’t have been possible the other way around.

But there are a couple of things I do miss from Blogger…

WordPress.com doesn’t allow you to use javascript in the sidebar. Now, I wouldn’t have known that Blogger did allow that, but when I went to use a couple of bits of third-party code I’d used fine over there I found they wouldn’t work over here. Hey, I didn’t even know they were Javascript, so it took me a while to discover why they woudn’t work in WordPress. (And I still don’t understand why WordPress doesn’t allow them. They didn’t seem to cause any problem over at Blogger.) 

The other thing I liked at blogger was the option to display your archive in a hierarchical structure, which isn’t available over here. (You can see what I mean on my family blog, Which Way’s Up, which is still at blogger.)

Meaning it.

I see the last seven posts have had nothing remotely to do with God. What does that say about how much my spiritual search occupies my mind?

Well, in church on Sunday morning we had some old songs. (Well, I say old, they were probably about fifteen years old which by many church’s standards are positively up to date, but the felt old for us.)  And - for a change - I was in the congregation rather than up front behind the drums, which meant I had time to think a little about the words. And all I could think over and over again was “do I mean any of this?” I can’t honestly say that I do, you know.

But does it matter whether I do?

A silly question

I was speaking to someone in real life the other day, and she mentioned that she’d “read my blog”. (Referring, as it happens, to my other blog.) She immediately went on to say, “I hope you don’t mind.“

Do I mind? If someone reads my blog? If I minded I’d be pretty daft having it on the internet. The more the merrier, I say.