Most of yesterday, I was in a bit of a turmoil. I just didn’t know how to respond to the announcements.
You see, I’d got used to the idea that I was going to be made redundant and would have to find something else. And I was pleased. Let’s face it, the chances were I was unlikely to ever find myself a new path of my own volition; staying at Land Registry has just been so easy. So being forced out was ideal.
Wednesday’s announcement that Peterborough and Croydon offices would be staying open, and yesterday’s realisation that we could simply opt to transfer if we so wished, came as a huge surprise. It’s a fantastic lifeline for many people, and I already know of lots here at Stevenage who are planning to do so. But for me it felt for a while like I was back to square one. The ball was is back in my court. I had to make the decision for myself that I thought had been made for me. It will be easy to transfer. And I also made the assumption that that’s what my wife would probably expect we’d do once she realised the possibility was there. Move to Peterborough, find school there for our son, a job for my wife.
But I Don’t Want To.
It seems bonkers to relocate us for the sake of my job. To change everything except the one thing I’d really like to change. And until I’d had a chance to talk it over with my wife, my stomach was in knots.
But we started to talk things through last night. And do you know what? I was wrong in my assumption. As far as she’s concerned, the Peterborough option hasn’t really changed anything for us. We knew I’d be looking for something else, so why change? By all means express an interest in maybe transferring, to keep my options open, but don’t assume that that’s what’s going to happen.
And today I feel much calmer. And am really beginning to think about what I’d like to do for a living. They asked me that at school 28 years ago. I still don’t know the answer.